Remote Work Reflections

March 16, 2020 was my first day of remote work. Little did I know at the time that what I originally envisioned as a 3-6 month vacation from the office would evolve into the default modus operandi for many knowledge workers, myself included, for nearly two years and counting. My thinking on remote work evolved and continues to evolve as I gain more experience with an office optional environment. Here are my learnings, mapped to the phases in the emotional cycle of change.

Phase I: Uninformed Optimism

Building Community. I initially welcomed the chance to work from home. We had to do it, and everyone I worked with was experiencing it together. We got to see animals and children and living conditions and parts of each other’s lives that we had never seen before. Connections deepened in unexpected ways.

Phase II: Uninformed Pessimism

Seeking Energy. After the initial adrenaline wore off, I realized that I was spending much more time alone than I ever had before. Video calls were a godsend for me, and I couldn’t understand why everyone else didn’t love them as much as I did. In the spirit of forging interpersonal connections, I pushed my team to be on camera. Luckily, my team trusted me enough to tell me I was wrong. My introverted colleagues explained that the low energy and mild discomfort I felt while working remotely was similar to the way they had felt after a long day of in person meetings at the office. Intellectually, I had understood what being introverted meant, but now, I understood how it felt.

I adapted my leadership style to reflect my newfound realization that some people weren’t craving human contact the way I was. Cameras became optional.

Combating Zoom Fatigue. After a while, those once exhilarating video calls became more tiring than in-person meetings ever were, even for an extrovert like me. I realized that, when I worked in an office, I would shuttle between conference rooms or even different office locations throughout the day. Furthermore, as a manager, I took the extra step of making as many development conversations as I could into walking meetings, coffee chats, lunches, or even happy hours. I concluded that a full day of in-person meetings at the office was not the same as sitting on video call after video call at home.

To combat fatigue, I learned to take breaks that involved leaving home altogether. After almost two years working remotely, I’ve learned what works best for me is an early morning focused start, followed by a 2.5 mile outing to pick up my daily green tea before my meetings begin (usually around 10am.) I also block an hour around midday or in the afternoon for a second 2.5 mile walk. By structuring my time this way, I’m able to average 12,000 steps per day. Given variable time zones, I sometimes have a longer work day than I’d prefer, but this schedule also offers me opportunities to take more breaks throughout the day, so I have more time in the evenings to myself.

Phase III: Valley of Despair

My friends tell me I’m the only woman in America who wore mascara and eyeliner every single working day of 2020. As someone who was formerly the social butterfly of the office, taking the time to get ready for work was the only thing I could think to do to cheer myself up and combat the monotony of working from home day after day. I concluded that remote work was definitely NOT for me, and I couldn’t wait to go back to the office at the first opportunity.

Phase IV: Informed Optimism

In 2021, I was diagnosed with recurrent corneal erosion, and eye makeup was out (until I can hopefully get the issue corrected in 2022.) I still make an effort to look decent for work because it makes me feel good, but looking put together now equates to jeans and a sweater, when it used to mean dropping hundreds of dollars at Ann Taylor. I wouldn’t want to go back.

I also learned that working remotely frees up more time in my day that I can now use to exercise, see friends, or engage in community activities. It’s hard to believe how much time I used to spend literally running from place to place—racing to the spin studio for a 6am class, racing to work and then all racing all day at work, racing to the gym after work, rushing home, and then hurrying to get dressed up for after dinner drinks with colleagues.

Don’t get me wrong—I loved how much energy I gained from being around people. But, I realized that I would have to figure out other ways to energize myself in this new environment. I probably wouldn’t be a social butterfly any longer, but I’d also probably make more progress on things that mattered.

Phase V: Success & Fulfillment

In my new role, I’ve found that going to the office once per week (when it’s safe to do so) is the ideal solution in my situation. I prioritize my lunch dates, coffee chats, and heart to hearts for the days I’m in person. I feel the energy I used to feel flitting around the office and greeting people. I get my city time. Then, I can focus on “deep work” and not rushing on the days that I’m home.

I read somewhere recently that so-called “water cooler” chats are not serendipitous, meaning it’s not a coincidence when you run into someone from a different team in the kitchen. This is a planned interaction. You are both required to report to the same work location. The challenge we now face is to apply the structure that we developed for the office to remote environments, without replicating the mistakes we made IRL.